During the recent Winter Olympics, 22yr old Eileen Gu (the most decorated female freeskier in history and the highest-paid athlete of the 2026 Winter Olympics) spoke about her mindset in a way that caught media attention. She described herself as introspective, someone who journals, someone who examines her thinking almost like a craft. She spoke about becoming exactly who she wants to be — not in a performative way, but in a deliberate one. As if identity itself were something she could refine.
“You can control how you think and therefore you can control who you are….I can literally become who I want to be” - Eileen Gu
It’s a far more interesting stance than the questions many of us default to.
Am I confident enough
Am I good enough?
Am I progressing fast enough?
A better question might be this: am I actively shaping who I’m becoming, or am I simply reacting to my environment?
Most leadership development, particularly in architecture and design, happens in response to pressure. A difficult client. A stretched programme. A team member who needs more direction than we expected. Over time, our reactions harden into patterns. We start to describe ourselves accordingly: I’m not very assertive, I overthink, I avoid conflict, I’m better behind the scenes.
Those descriptions feel factual. But they are often narrative.
Our identity is an internalised and evolving story we tell about ourselves. The way we explain our past and imagine our future shapes how we act in the present. In other words, the brain is constantly organising experience into narrative form, and that narrative influences behaviour.
The way we imagine our future self — vividly or vaguely, confidently or fearfully — affects motivation and action. When the future version of us is detailed and emotionally compelling, we are more likely to move towards it. When it is abstract, it remains a wish.
This is where multi-sensory future reflection becomes powerful.
If I write, “I want to be a confident leader,” nothing changes.
But if I write, “I walk into the meeting room without rushing. I can feel my shoulders drop as I sit down. My voice is measured, not hurried. I listen fully before responding. I set the meeting direction clearly and without apology,” something else happens.
The brain does not respond strongly to labels. It responds to experience. Sensory detail — what I can see, hear and feel — activates mental simulation.
Studies in cognitive neuroscience show that vividly imagining an action recruits many of the same neural networks involved in performing it. We are, in effect, rehearsing.
When I repeatedly describe myself as calm under pressure, decisive in meetings, or clear about boundaries, in concrete, sensory terms, I begin to normalise that version of myself. The narrative shifts from “That’s not really me” to “That is someone I am becoming.” And when identity shifts, behaviour follows more naturally.
Gu’s comment about becoming the kind of person her younger self would admire is a narrative statement. It assumes agency. It assumes that identity is not fixed but shaped through deliberate attention. Neuroplasticity supports this view: repeated patterns of thought and behaviour strengthen particular neural pathways. The more often we rehearse a way of thinking or responding, the more accessible it becomes.
For architects, this should feel familiar. You design buildings in detail before they exist. You imagine how the light falls at 4pm in winter. You consider how a one material meets another. You do not leave those elements to chance.
Yet many of us leave our leadership identity largely unexamined, allowing it to be shaped by stress, culture and habit.
“The story you repeatedly tell about your future self quietly shapes how you lead today.”
So instead of asking whether you are confident, try asking: what does confident look like in behaviour, in tone, in posture?
Instead of asking whether you are progressing fast enough, ask: who am I intentionally becoming through the way I respond this week?
You could even write a letter to yourself from the future. Describe it in sensory detail — what you see, what you hear, how you feel in your body, what you say in meetings, what you no longer tolerate. Then read it regularly. Not as affirmation, but as rehearsal.
You are already reinforcing a story about yourself every day — in how you speak, how you decide, what you tolerate. The question is whether that story is accidental.
Leadership is not only about external strategy. It is also about narrative authorship. When you consciously shape the story of your future self — in grounded, sensory detail — you begin to influence how you show up now.
And that is far more powerful than waiting to feel ready.
PS: This article is part of a bi-weekly email series explaining the leadership questions in the Architect’s Leadership Journal. You can join this email series here.